While we can all look back and say that 2020 was a year we are happy to see go, it was also the year that taught us about how important human connection is to health and thriving. Technology came through for us in a big way (man, I wish I owned a bunch of Zoom stock pre pandemic) and the simple things like fresh air and long walks became the celebrations, which is probably the way it always should have been. As it always seems to be, challenge teaches us a lot if we choose to reflect, so, here are my hopes for a new normal because I know that there is health and healing ahead for all of us if we choose to invite it.
Come Back Kinder - As much as I want kids to be back learning in the classroom, I have to admit there has been a certain lightness for me as a mom not having to think about “the mean kids”. I have always said that there is no amount you could pay me to return to junior high, and when Matthew started, I hated thinking about the kids who don’t get him. I’ve seen it firsthand throughout his school days, kids can be terribly mean when they see something that looks or processes different than what they are used to, and in so many ways he has thrived at home away from what can be an overwhelming, fight or flight scene at school. My hope is that kids will all have missed socializing together so much, they will look to make friends, and everyone will be met with kindness and connection when they finally get to return. Praying hard for this one. Feel free to join in with me on this prayer:)
Keep growing - I listen to podcasts, read articles and books, and talk with people to expose myself to new thoughts and hear perspectives other than my own. It’s not because I don’t know myself, or lack confidence in what I think, but because this exposure broadens my horizons. Learning is one of the greatest keys to longevity in this life. We are never too old to learn something new and the greatest barrier I have seen to embracing new concepts and ideas, is thinking that other people have more to learn than we do. It’s not a competition, or a scale, but staying set in your ways without investigating new ideas is a fast way to shrink your world and your connection with it. I hope that we can carve out the time to take in new knowledge and perspective no matter what challenges we are facing. Knowledge connects us and helps us find compassion for the experience of others. In the end, it’s a choice.
Get organized - This podcast with James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, is great for the New Year and the quote I loved out of it most was this one:
“ You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”
Simple genius is my favorite and this one rang loud and clear for me. In any new year, we have an “out with the old, in with the new” mentality. Most of us spend some time organizing and planning for what we want to accomplish. Do you have systems? Healthy life design? How we do the small things is how we do the big things. Where do you want to start? Need help? Let me know:)
Do Power Differently - It starts with ourselves, how we view power and how we claim it. Power as we traditionally think of it in America has been abused and corrupted so much that the word has a negative vibe. I’ve said many times this year, the power structures are broken. Thoughts of trying to fix the structures often overwhelm me and I have to retrace my steps and bring it back down to myself, my thoughts, and my actions. Even my family structure challenges me, without a partner, I feel the weight of power…and the fear of claiming it sometimes. Single parenting is hard, there is no one to back you up. I have a value system I want to teach and uphold and it takes power to convey a message. I’ve learned to stay the course and have the tough conversations because real power is connection, not domination. We all have a purpose, a light that should shine in this world, that doesn’t take away from anyone else and their own light. Imagine if we all claimed our true and authentic power, not to oppress or project on others, or prove that we are right, but to be bold enough to stand in our truth and have the confidence to listen as others do the same. We would create opportunities for ourselves and for others at the same time and we could lift each other up - away from self doubt and gaslighting one another to prove our own truth, and into a place of safety to tell our own story. This is real power, and what I most want to see in leaders today…and we are the leaders.
2020 taught us that gratitude for a roof over our head, food in the fridge, and someone to hug and talk to are among our greatest earthly gifts. How will you honor those gifts in your own life this year? Or offer a hand to someone who struggles to find any of vital needs? How can we be better for ourselves so we can be more helpful to others?
If you are a reader and connector with my words, you can help me. This blog started as an expression for myself, and a place to give insight to my kids when they are old enough to be curious about what their mom was thinking way back when. I have been in the business of growing myself and others for a long time, but 2021 is the year to make it official. I’d be honored if you would share my words or If you or anyone you love needs coaching to find greater calm and connection and better life design to raise your vibration, find deeper health, or more flow in life, I am ready to help. I would love to hear about some of your hopes for 2021! Here’s is to a prosperous 2021, with strong backs that can carry and protect, and soft hearts that are ready to listen and receive.
Here’s my pick for song of the week - it’s a older one - but the lyrics are genius and always put a lump in my throat.