What I Meant To Say...

All my life, and part of the reason I like to write so much, is because it slows down my thoughts, and gives me time to express myself clearly.  We’ve all had moments we wish we could take words back or make our thoughts come out differently, but then there is also just good old […]
Wendy Jones
April 4, 2021

All my life, and part of the reason I like to write so much, is because it slows down my thoughts, and gives me time to express myself clearly.  We’ve all had moments we wish we could take words back or make our thoughts come out differently, but then there is also just good old fashioned hindsight, what life has taught us that becomes valuable on our journey. Learning to look at ourselves rather than pointing a finger at someone else or make an excuse is a challenge that opens the path to a bigger life, a life that keeps growing, changing, and creates longevity no matter how old we are.  Introspection can feel invasive and scary, but without it, life becomes a history of repeated patterns that we don’t learn from and we end up judging and projecting all over each other. So, as I see it, ‘what I meant to say’ becomes the way forward to reverse the patterns in our lives that we want to correct, and, while the truth is it’s never too late to discover new paths, I am inspired to write about these lessons with the hope that it will help someone else learn earlier than I did.   Lately I’ve been considering all the topics that I could cover with a ‘what I meant to say’, in so many ways, it’s the why behind my blog, so here are just a few of my thoughts on this incredibly busy Easter week as I begin to explore this topic deeper.

What it feels like matters more than what it looks like. Don’t base your choices on what it looks like to everyone else, feel into the experience and learn to trust your gut. Five years ago, I had a life that seemed enviable from the outside, but was crumbling on the inside.  Today, I have 100% more confidence and health because I faced down what scared me, had some stuck and difficult days in the middle, and came out the other side flowing. 

Vibration is a state of being.  When we learn how to release fear and feel  peace in the present moment, there is no limit for how high we can go. The more I have learned to align with my true self, the higher my vibration - and the people, opportunities, and things that cross my path organically feel right.  I’ve had other times in my life when I have hid from myself, a truth that I knew but didn’t want to face yet, or a fear that was holding me back.  In that space, goals become unclear, and action turns into paralysis…keep leveling up that vibration and life begins to flow simply. 

Fear contracts us and makes us live smaller than we should. Speaking of feeling stuck, it’s a real thing. It’s the reason I can get 100 things done in thirty minutes and yet if I have an entire open day, sometimes I can barely get one thing covered. The trick is to picture your greatest life and go after it. (*hint - don’t get distracted, focus is the gateway to flow)  I have felt it in real time. The question is what do you fear?  When we picture the worst, or speak to ourselves in the negative, we tighten up and dim our light.  The world is never asking this of us, so why do we put it on us ourselves?

Music is free healing. It has pulled me out of more funks that you could possibly imagine.  When in doubt blast your favorite music while you take a drive, a walk, a shower, or do the dishes.  It is a game changer. And maybe the reason I end my blog every week with a song. Zac Brown and Tim McGraw have helped me work through some tough spots.

Learning to let go is part of every gain. We want it all, but I am here to say we can’t have it all at once. There are trades offs, space that we have to free up in our minds and lives if we are going to live a clear minded and connected life. We have to let go… of comparison, negativity, perfectionism, and so many other things to make room for abundance.

If there is anything that I have been feeling in the last week it’s flow.  Charting my course, aligning with my values and vision, and attracting everything that goes along with that path. This week’s simple blog is part of a much bigger plan.  What can you do to follow your path and live with greater joy and purpose? I promise it will be worth it. Take the higher road, and trust that it will all come together.  If anyone tries to get in the way of that, remember who you are and what you want to accomplish and keep going, and, while you are at it, be inclusive and bring others along with you. There are exciting things to come with The Optimists Journal, interlacing with game of life mindset with my love for volleyball and the generational wisdom that I want to pass down to athletes far and wide and as well as the ones close to my heart already (let’s go @tcubeachvb and @savestanfordmvb!) .  We all have a story, the question is will we get the most out of it by examining ourselves and our place in this world, so that we have more flow in our life and less times where we are left with a ‘what I meant to say’. 

Happy Easter!

With Love & Optimism,


As a mom, this song never gets old.

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About the author:
Wendy Jones is a mother of four, lifelong athlete, writer, and optimism & resilience coach and speaker. Through 20 years of parenting and relationship struggles, she believes that vulnerability and our willingness to share our stories is a way to heal ourselves

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